As I slipping through the Today newspaper early this morning, my eyes were hooked up on an article under the Relationship column, ‘Loved to Death”. The headlines of the article was ‘Holding on too tight is the fastest way to lose someone’. Here is a bit of the story…” So when you do meet the promising someone, sometimes all you want to do is to hold on tightly as not to lose them. Unfortunately, that can result in the opposite of the desired outcome. Holding on tight is an almost sure way of getting that special someone to try and squirm out of your very tight grasp.” So how do you show your love to that special someone? Are you trying to smother them with love and affection or just set them free? Sometimes, you start to smother as your feeling of insecurity grows. This leads to one-person-loving-more theory to be applicable in this situation. Meaning, you love your partner more than their feelings on you. But if one person has to love more, why it should be you? Most of us would agree that by smothering and chasing our partner all around, keeping a bit of distance between you and your partner is always a safe play and a good practice. Have our own life and do you own things sometimes instead of creating 24-hour of non-stop suffocation in our partner’s life with our existence and affection that they do not have even a sip of fresh air without us in it. According to the article, there are some signs and symptoms to identify whether you are smothering or suffocating someone who you believe is your true love. If you recognise yourself as having any of the signs below, then you are stopping your partner to breath.

 You SMS every once in a while and if you don’t get an immediate reply, you SMS even more

 You call all the time telling him or her you miss them

 You turned up unannounced at his or her house to surprise him or her

 You get sulky when he or she can’t see you because they have other plans or commitments

 You expect him or her to want to stay with you all the time

 You believe that the best way to show your love is by making your presence felt every minute of the day

As the article ends up a pinch of the principle on love, it says that it is better to let our partner to have their own sweet time breathing without us disturbing and distracting them. After all, the adage “Treat them mean to keep them keen” has some truth in it. If we are having any of those signs above, it is advisable for us to try cooling down and stop all those habits. This might prevent our partner from driving themselves away from us and making them appreciate us more (hope so).

p/s: this is just what the author said. It might not be applicable to all. Some people enjoy the persistent smothering of love by their partners. But I do feel that each of us need our own sweet time and space to do our thingy without any interruptions or participations from our loved ones.

Love Allah fisrt before you love His creatures...